ok, so my work email gets at least 200 crap emails a day, 85% are about drugs and 90% of those drugs will enhance my penis size. since i use outlook, each email appears open on my computer while i delete them, so quite often there are giant veiny dicks or girls in thongs on my screen — which my office-mates love to mock me for. generally i just highlight them and delete in batches, and as i was doing so today, i met my match.
my eye was caught by a subject reading “beat her womb with your giant…”. one — can we appreciate how hilarious this is — does that seem safe? pleasureful? does that include an abortion with the casual sex? i don’t know, i’m not a doctor. what i do know is that the email contained this great poem:
Now that you’ve met a lass that’s hot
You wanna screw her juicy twat.
She’s so attractive, she’s so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will long for more?
You need a dic’k she would adore!
But how to get it long and thick?
Your only chance is MegaDik!
You’ll get so wanted super-size
And see great pleasure in her eyes!
Your schlong will pound her poon so deep,
Tonight you’ll hardly fall asleep!
So try today this wonder-pi’ll
And change your life at your own will!
i’ve been so amused all morning. i really like the effort that went into this spam email, and as an expert, i must say that it is heads and shafts above the rest. there are a few things that i don’t understand (mostly why there are so many apostrophes in words that don’t require them), but even though this product doesn’t apply to my gender, i would like to encourage people to use it so that they can keep up the great marketing.
